We may start the holidays with a desire to eat healthy and stay trim, but in the end if we desire three servings of pumpkin cheesecake more than we desire good health, which do you think will win out?
It always seem a more effective use of energy for me to work on change from the inside out rather than attempt to have iron discipline. I don't really like to be 'iron disciplined' by anyone-not even myself! Do you?
In my last post I talked about the importance of establishing a need when attempting fundamental change. The second and third steps Fournier taught were Desire and Vivid Vision. Keep in mind that each step enhances the one before and after it. So pumping up your desire will increase your feeling of need and establishing a valid need will naturally increase your desire.
I want to mention both steps two and three together because one of the best methods for increasing your desire is to work on your vivid vision.
Spend time each day visualizing how your life will look when making healthy choices is a consistent part of your life. Visualize yourself reaching into the fridge and grabbing fixings for a salad. Picture yourself with high energy, bright eyes, clear skin, or whatever motivates you to eat healthy and exercise. Make sure you can see it in great detail.
The stronger your vision is, the greater your desire will be. Continue to refer to your cost/payoff list so that the need remains strong in your heart and mind.
Although discipline will always be required with making healthy choices, you will find greater success and victory if you take these steps this holiday season. Each of these steps will ultimately lead to a passionate commitment which requires less discipline than a weak commitment to something you know you should do but don't really want to do.
Thursday, November 18, 2010
Wednesday, November 17, 2010
Holidays and Food
Did you know that Americans on average gain 5lbs every holiday season? 5lbs which most never lose! That can start to add up! So the holidays are approaching and this week I implemented some strategies for staying ahead in the food game. I'm going to share a few of these over the next week or so, I hope you enjoy them and that you'll share your tricks as well!
I always feel like trying to have more self-discipline is just like hacking at the branches of the trees rather than getting to the root of things. One of my favorite classes I've ever taken was called, "Being Your Best' and it was developed by Mark Fournier. He taught about four steps that lead to a passionate commitment.
The first step is to Establish a Need. This is an essential and often overlooked step to fundamental change. You may have been trying to lose weight for years, but if overall things are pretty okay, then deep down you may not really feel a need do anything different. You may really want things to be different, but if you asked yourself do you really need them to be different, the answer might be, "hmm...actually...no."
So we establish a need by looking at things differently. We start choosing to see the long term consequences of continuing the way we are. Fournier teaches the use of a 'cost/payoff' list.
If you are working on having a healthier lifestyle, list the costs of not improving this area of your life. Think of things that really matter, like being in good health for your kids and enjoying your later years with your spouse. Also list the payoffs of making the changes you desire to make. Refer to this list often and in this way you establish a need-the first step to fundamental change.
I always feel like trying to have more self-discipline is just like hacking at the branches of the trees rather than getting to the root of things. One of my favorite classes I've ever taken was called, "Being Your Best' and it was developed by Mark Fournier. He taught about four steps that lead to a passionate commitment.
The first step is to Establish a Need. This is an essential and often overlooked step to fundamental change. You may have been trying to lose weight for years, but if overall things are pretty okay, then deep down you may not really feel a need do anything different. You may really want things to be different, but if you asked yourself do you really need them to be different, the answer might be, "hmm...actually...no."
So we establish a need by looking at things differently. We start choosing to see the long term consequences of continuing the way we are. Fournier teaches the use of a 'cost/payoff' list.
If you are working on having a healthier lifestyle, list the costs of not improving this area of your life. Think of things that really matter, like being in good health for your kids and enjoying your later years with your spouse. Also list the payoffs of making the changes you desire to make. Refer to this list often and in this way you establish a need-the first step to fundamental change.
Wednesday, June 16, 2010
Determining God's Will in My Life-Part 2
This has been a difficult post for me to compose. There are so many interesting angles to consider and it is such a personal topic-I hope these posts spark some discussion and that I can learn where others agree and disagree.
In the end my biggest complaint is that I can't seem to organize my thoughts. It doesn't fit in a logical bulleted list, if you will. So forgive me if I meander, but I will share my thoughts on discerning God's will in our lives. It might take me a few posts, I don't know...we'll see where it leads...
A Christian's Cop-Out
In the end my biggest complaint is that I can't seem to organize my thoughts. It doesn't fit in a logical bulleted list, if you will. So forgive me if I meander, but I will share my thoughts on discerning God's will in our lives. It might take me a few posts, I don't know...we'll see where it leads...
A Christian's Cop-Out
Law of attraction teachers do not usually focus very much on discerning and living God’s will. The focus usually tends to be more about creating the life you want and having everything you desire. But for those of us who love and trust God, we want to do His will so much more than we want to follow our own wants and passions.
The danger for those so committed to His will comes if we immobilize ourselves and stop actively creating our lives as we passively wait for ‘His will to be done.’ Or we might accept that everything that comes our way is His will, without questioning and thinking for ourselves.
In his October 2006 conference address, Elder David A. Bednar said,
As sons and daughters of our Heavenly Father, we have been blessed with the gift of moral agency, the capacity for independent action and choice. Endowed with agency, you and I are agents, and we primarily are to act and not just be acted upon.
It is our duty, then to learn His will (a process in and of itself,) and then to create in our lives what He wills for us. This is where the greatest power to create lies: when we are in alignment with His will, and working to create it in our lives.
In attempting to discern God’s will in our lives, the first mistake most of us make throughout this process is assuming too much. And too much of what we assume about what God desires for us is negative.
Sometimes we even push away the good He wants to bless us with in a mixed up attempt to live His will. An interesting book on this topic is, “The Millionaire from Nazareth”. This book is a thought provoking treatise on the biases many Christians have about Jesus Christ and money.
We must be careful that our supposed ‘accepting of His will’ is not just a cop out, freeing us from the accountability of creating good in our lives. (This topic is addressed in my post: "Is this God's will or am I sabotaging?")
As a general rule I believe it is God’s will that we have health, wealth, and fulfilling relationships. When we have those things we are better able to serve our fellow beings. This is important to note because so many of us waste so much time wondering if God really wants good things for us. Study Matthew 7:7-12 if you aren’t sure you believe that.
Friday, June 11, 2010
Determining God's Will in My Life, Part 1
A reader's comment has sparked this blog. After reading, "Is this God's will, or am I sabotaging?", the reader asked, "How do you determine and discover Gods will? How do you keep from injecting your own desires and wants into that discovery?"
My mind keeps going in two directions as I consider this question, so this post will come in two parts. To those who love God, this first post is just a reminder of what we already know and desire. The second will explore the more complex aspects of discerning God's will.
Time With God
Some of the components to my ability to discern God's will are specific to my religious beliefs, but most can be applied to any and all of us who love God and seek to do His will, regardless of religious affiliation. I reference a most helpful talk by Elder Dallin H. Oaks, a leader in my church, called, "Be Ye Not Deceived".
I will include several quotes from this talk that are guidelines to me in keeping the connections between God and myself as open and clear as possible.
"Now I wish to speak about how each of us can avoid being deceived on matters of eternal importance. I have two texts. The first is what Paul taught Timothy after giving him the warning I quoted earlier. Continue in the things you have learned and been assured of, he wrote, “knowing of whom thou hast learned them” (2 Tim. 3:14). In other words, you have been taught righteousness and assured of its truth, so stay with it. Continuing, Paul reminded his young friend “that from a child thou hast known the holy scriptures, which are able to make thee wise unto salvation” through faith in our Savior (2 Tim. 3:15). Hold fast to the scriptures, whose teachings protect us against evil."
Spending time daily in God's word is essential to understanding and determining His will in my life. He speaks to me through the words I am reading, but also between the words with the thoughts that come into my mind and the feelings that come into my heart during these quiet moments. It is not easy to make time for this, but most rewarding, and one of my highest priorities.
Hand in hand with spending time in His word is taking the time to record thoughts and feelings that come to me during this time.
Clean Hands and a Pure Heart
"It is not enough to have received the truth. We must also “have taken the Holy Spirit for [our] guide” and “not [be] deceived.
Living Right
"The Holy Ghost will protect us against being deceived, but to realize that wonderful blessing we must always do the things necessary to retain that Spirit. We must keep the commandments, pray for guidance, and attend church and partake of the sacrament each Sunday. And we must never do anything to drive away that Spirit. Specifically, we should avoid pornography, alcohol, tobacco and drugs, and always, always avoid violations of the law of chastity. We must never take things into our bodies or do things with our bodies that drive away the Spirit of the Lord and leave us without our spiritual protection against deception."
"To avoid being deceived, we must also follow the promptings of that Spirit...I will conclude by describing another subtle form of deception—the idea that it is enough to hear and believe without acting on that belief. Many prophets have taught against that deception. The Apostle James wrote, “Be ye doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving your own selves” (James 1:22).
By showing God that when we receive his word we consistently act on it, we qualify ourselves for further direction from Him.
A Way of Life
All of these patterns of living help set the stage for understanding God's will for us in our lives. Even when we are consistent about preparing fertile ground, it can still be a complex thing to know and live His will in our lives. Watch for the next post to further explore this concept.
My mind keeps going in two directions as I consider this question, so this post will come in two parts. To those who love God, this first post is just a reminder of what we already know and desire. The second will explore the more complex aspects of discerning God's will.
Time With God
Some of the components to my ability to discern God's will are specific to my religious beliefs, but most can be applied to any and all of us who love God and seek to do His will, regardless of religious affiliation. I reference a most helpful talk by Elder Dallin H. Oaks, a leader in my church, called, "Be Ye Not Deceived".
I will include several quotes from this talk that are guidelines to me in keeping the connections between God and myself as open and clear as possible.
"Now I wish to speak about how each of us can avoid being deceived on matters of eternal importance. I have two texts. The first is what Paul taught Timothy after giving him the warning I quoted earlier. Continue in the things you have learned and been assured of, he wrote, “knowing of whom thou hast learned them” (2 Tim. 3:14). In other words, you have been taught righteousness and assured of its truth, so stay with it. Continuing, Paul reminded his young friend “that from a child thou hast known the holy scriptures, which are able to make thee wise unto salvation” through faith in our Savior (2 Tim. 3:15). Hold fast to the scriptures, whose teachings protect us against evil."
Spending time daily in God's word is essential to understanding and determining His will in my life. He speaks to me through the words I am reading, but also between the words with the thoughts that come into my mind and the feelings that come into my heart during these quiet moments. It is not easy to make time for this, but most rewarding, and one of my highest priorities.
Hand in hand with spending time in His word is taking the time to record thoughts and feelings that come to me during this time.
Clean Hands and a Pure Heart
"It is not enough to have received the truth. We must also “have taken the Holy Spirit for [our] guide” and “not [be] deceived.
How do we take the Holy Spirit for our guide? We must repent of our sins each week and renew our covenants by partaking of the sacrament with clean hands and a pure heart, as we are commanded to do (see D&C 59:8–9, 12). Only in this way can we have the divine promise that we will “always have his Spirit to be with [us]” (D&C 20:77). That Spirit is the Holy Ghost, whose mission is to teach us, to lead us to truth, and to testify of the Father and the Son (see John 14:26; John 15:26; John 16:13; 3 Ne. 11:32, 36)."
In my religion, partaking of the sacrament weekly is an essential step in the repentance process. Whatever your process may look like, repenting, forgiving, having a clean and pure heart makes us a receptacle for God's truth and wisdom. Because of Christ's sacrifice, we can be made clean and whole in spite of our human weakness. We must partake of and receive that cleansing gift on a regular basis in order to best receive an understanding from Him of what He desires in our lives.Living Right
"The Holy Ghost will protect us against being deceived, but to realize that wonderful blessing we must always do the things necessary to retain that Spirit. We must keep the commandments, pray for guidance, and attend church and partake of the sacrament each Sunday. And we must never do anything to drive away that Spirit. Specifically, we should avoid pornography, alcohol, tobacco and drugs, and always, always avoid violations of the law of chastity. We must never take things into our bodies or do things with our bodies that drive away the Spirit of the Lord and leave us without our spiritual protection against deception."
Although we are not able to live these standards perfectly all the time, I have found that the closer I am living to God's standards, the better I can hear and understand His will for my life. Course corrections are a frequent and welcome part of becoming more like Him.
"To avoid being deceived, we must also follow the promptings of that Spirit...I will conclude by describing another subtle form of deception—the idea that it is enough to hear and believe without acting on that belief. Many prophets have taught against that deception. The Apostle James wrote, “Be ye doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving your own selves” (James 1:22).
By showing God that when we receive his word we consistently act on it, we qualify ourselves for further direction from Him.
A Way of Life
All of these patterns of living help set the stage for understanding God's will for us in our lives. Even when we are consistent about preparing fertile ground, it can still be a complex thing to know and live His will in our lives. Watch for the next post to further explore this concept.
Monday, May 10, 2010
Visualizing Makes Me Depressed!
I was talking to a friend recently about visualizing the change they desire in their lives. Their comment to me was that they didn't like to visualize about the way they wanted things to be, because it just made them depressed about the way things were.
An excellent point, and one that must be addressed by any of us who are serious about using the tool of visualization. A couple of years ago I was driving an older car and had a desire to replace it with something newer that fit my family better. So I started visualizing this new car that I wanted.
I was pretty new at visualizing and found that every time I got in my car I liked it less and felt more discouraged that I was still driving it. That kind of reaction is not the purpose of visualizing! Feelings of discouragement and lack of gratitude only push away the fulfillment of our desires.
Accept What Is
An important first step to initiating change in our lives is, ironically, to accept the way things are. 1st Timothy 6:8 advises us: "And having food and raiment let us be therewith content." We need to know deep within that if nothing ever changed we could find happiness and contentment with the way things are.
Finding this contentment with the way things are actually helps us feel that we deserve to improve our situations, whether we are talking about prosperity, health, or relationships. It is empowering to accept what is and helps us leave the place of being a victim to circumstances and create the life we desire.
We Find What We Are Looking For
When you finish visualizing, prepare your mind for what you will see when you open your eyes. Think for a brief moment about the way things are at the end of your visualizing. Think of it from an angle that brings a smile to your face. Determine to open your eyes and see in your life what is good and right and beautiful.
Using my car example, I could end my visualizing by thinking about my children in the car I was then driving. I could think about my gratitude that I have a car that is safe and gets me where I need to go. This keeps me in a positive, grateful vibration and will move me towards more that will make me positive and grateful.
Remember that we are always trying to bring ourselves into alignment with truth. And the truth in every situation is that we have much to be grateful for. One of my favorite scriptures on this topic says:
"O how you ought to thank your heavenly King! I say unto you, my brethren that if you should render all the thanks and praise which your whole soul has power to possess, to that God who has created you, and has kept and preserved you, ...-I say unto you that if ye should serve him who has created you from the beginning, and is preserving you from day to day, by lending you breath, that ye may live and move and do according to your own will, and even supporting you from one moment to another-I say, if ye should serve him with all your whole souls yet ye would be unprofitable servants....And ye are still indebted unto him, and are, and will be, forever and ever; therefore, of what have ye to boast?" Book of Mormon; Mosiah 2: 19-21, 24, excerpts
Work on Hope
One of the reasons visualizing can discourage some people is because the moment they are done visualizing, they begin to affirm that they will never have what they desire. They counteract their visualizing with feelings of not deserving. They might think thoughts in alignment with their false beliefs. "It will never happen." "It's too hard". "If it was supposed to happen, it already would have". And on and on....
As those thoughts and feelings come to the surface, acknowledge them and release them, turning your focus to affirming truthful, empowering thoughts. Spend some time healing and releasing the dis-empowering habits of thinking that have been keeping your from receiving good in your life. (Please see Pulling Weeds Part 1, 2, and 3)
Visualizing the good you desire will set you on the path to receiving it. An important step on this path is overcoming the obstacles you have set for yourself in your own heart and mind. Visualizing will help these become more apparent to you so that you can release them. Be aware, use your intuition.
As we accept what is, have gratitude for the good, and have hope for what's coming, we'll have much more positive experiences with our visualizing. This is a process and like anything-with practice and training, you will find it gets easier.
Remember that this is tool you are already using and have used all your life, just be more deliberate about using it to bring what you really want into your life.
An excellent point, and one that must be addressed by any of us who are serious about using the tool of visualization. A couple of years ago I was driving an older car and had a desire to replace it with something newer that fit my family better. So I started visualizing this new car that I wanted.
I was pretty new at visualizing and found that every time I got in my car I liked it less and felt more discouraged that I was still driving it. That kind of reaction is not the purpose of visualizing! Feelings of discouragement and lack of gratitude only push away the fulfillment of our desires.
Accept What Is
An important first step to initiating change in our lives is, ironically, to accept the way things are. 1st Timothy 6:8 advises us: "And having food and raiment let us be therewith content." We need to know deep within that if nothing ever changed we could find happiness and contentment with the way things are.
Finding this contentment with the way things are actually helps us feel that we deserve to improve our situations, whether we are talking about prosperity, health, or relationships. It is empowering to accept what is and helps us leave the place of being a victim to circumstances and create the life we desire.
We Find What We Are Looking For
When you finish visualizing, prepare your mind for what you will see when you open your eyes. Think for a brief moment about the way things are at the end of your visualizing. Think of it from an angle that brings a smile to your face. Determine to open your eyes and see in your life what is good and right and beautiful.
Using my car example, I could end my visualizing by thinking about my children in the car I was then driving. I could think about my gratitude that I have a car that is safe and gets me where I need to go. This keeps me in a positive, grateful vibration and will move me towards more that will make me positive and grateful.
Remember that we are always trying to bring ourselves into alignment with truth. And the truth in every situation is that we have much to be grateful for. One of my favorite scriptures on this topic says:
"O how you ought to thank your heavenly King! I say unto you, my brethren that if you should render all the thanks and praise which your whole soul has power to possess, to that God who has created you, and has kept and preserved you, ...-I say unto you that if ye should serve him who has created you from the beginning, and is preserving you from day to day, by lending you breath, that ye may live and move and do according to your own will, and even supporting you from one moment to another-I say, if ye should serve him with all your whole souls yet ye would be unprofitable servants....And ye are still indebted unto him, and are, and will be, forever and ever; therefore, of what have ye to boast?" Book of Mormon; Mosiah 2: 19-21, 24, excerpts
Work on Hope
One of the reasons visualizing can discourage some people is because the moment they are done visualizing, they begin to affirm that they will never have what they desire. They counteract their visualizing with feelings of not deserving. They might think thoughts in alignment with their false beliefs. "It will never happen." "It's too hard". "If it was supposed to happen, it already would have". And on and on....
As those thoughts and feelings come to the surface, acknowledge them and release them, turning your focus to affirming truthful, empowering thoughts. Spend some time healing and releasing the dis-empowering habits of thinking that have been keeping your from receiving good in your life. (Please see Pulling Weeds Part 1, 2, and 3)
Visualizing the good you desire will set you on the path to receiving it. An important step on this path is overcoming the obstacles you have set for yourself in your own heart and mind. Visualizing will help these become more apparent to you so that you can release them. Be aware, use your intuition.
As we accept what is, have gratitude for the good, and have hope for what's coming, we'll have much more positive experiences with our visualizing. This is a process and like anything-with practice and training, you will find it gets easier.
Remember that this is tool you are already using and have used all your life, just be more deliberate about using it to bring what you really want into your life.
Tuesday, April 13, 2010
Is this God's will, or am I sabotaging?
We have discussed in previous posts the importance of asking with real intent the question, "Why do I need this in my life?" when we are working on changing our present results. Another angle to consider when searching for the answer to this question is the question, "Is this God's will, or am I sabotaging his will?"
How Can I Know?
I have noticed that people with a deep desire to do God's will are sometimes a little too quick to assume that the garbage in their life is His will for them. This idea is most likely based in the truth that trials are an intentional part of our existence. Because we know this is true, we are sometimes too willing to embrace and hold on to negative experiences, perpetuating something that might not necessarily be His will for us any longer.
It is my belief that in most instances, God's will for us is to have good in our life. To have love, health, and prosperity. Many of the challenges that rock our world are there for no other reason than to move us more quickly into the good that He wants for us. At other times those challenges are there because we are sabotaging His will for us, and He allows us to do this. A third possibility is that we are to experience a challenge for most or all of our existence in order to progress in the way that is best suited to us.
It is imperative that we discover which of these scenarios is responsible for what is happening in our life. With this understanding, we can make better choices for moving through the challenge.
It takes honest and prayerful meditation to discover whether we are living God's will or sabotaging it. It is all too easy to look at our present results and assume that if God meant for them to be different, they would be. If God meant for me to have financial independence, I'd have been born with it. If He meant for me to have love, I'd have it. If He meant me to be well, I wouldn't be sick. Haven't I prayed for help? This must be His will for my life.
It is only through prayer, personal revelation and deeply honest introspection that we can come to the conclusion that we are meant to remain in a current challenge. Without that sacred witness, we must assume that what He wants is for us to learn from and move through the current lack in our life.
It takes courage to look deeply enough to discover the truth about sabotaging. Sabotaging is usually done out of fear-an attempt to protect ourselves. You may have to ponder what it is you are afraid of. Often when we use 'It's God's will' as an excuse, we are using it as a cop out from exercising faith.
If it isn't God's will that we remain in a current challenge, that of course means we will need to exercise faith for change. We may discover fears such as: What if I don't have enough faith? What if He won't help me? What if I fail? Once we honestly assess these fears and concerns we can begin, with God's help, to address and move through them.
Perhaps it feels presumptuous to you to assume that God might want more good for you in your life. As a parent, wouldn't you be pleased if your child fully engaged in a challenge with the purpose of learning what needed to be learned, mastered the skill, and moved on?
Also keep in mind that where much is given much is required. The reason He wants us to prosper is because there is so much work to do. God has work to do and wants us involved, laboring in His vineyard.
From this perspective, this good in our life is a means to an end, not the end itself. If we are stable financially, physically healthy, and existing in fulfilling relationships, how much better are we able to do His work than if we are not? Of course this is what He wants for us.
To Engage or To Release?
Once we have determined whether the challenge we are dealing with is evidence of our own sabotage or God's will for our growth, we will know how to proceed.
If we discover that this challenge is no longer what God wants for us, it's time to 'release that which we no longer need' (Louise Hay, You Can Heal Your Life) and start affirming truth in our lives. We may need to work on issues of deserving. We may need to overcome false beliefs such as 'there isn't enough' or 'it's too hard' or 'it's not safe'.
Realize that if we really believed that what we are striving for was in our best good, we would already have it. We must change those inner beliefs to be in accordance with God's will. We can use visualization techniques, we can work with a counselor. Keep a vision of where you feel God wants your life to be and solutions will open up to you. Be patient, with time you will see progress.
If, however, you feel that this trial is something God has helped place in your life, then it's time to engage. Ponder, pray, explore, examine, study. Think of it as a wave and you are the surfer who's trying to catch it. Ride it as far as it can take you.
Resist berating yourself for where you are at. Be grateful for the opportunity because this is evidence that God feels you are ready for growth and change. Accept the feelings and reactions you have with patience and love. They are coming to the surface because it's time to grow through them.
When you have times of doubt, think back on the time when you felt an understanding for His will in your life. He won't leave you alone through this period of growth. He knows and wants what is for your best good.
How Can I Know?
I have noticed that people with a deep desire to do God's will are sometimes a little too quick to assume that the garbage in their life is His will for them. This idea is most likely based in the truth that trials are an intentional part of our existence. Because we know this is true, we are sometimes too willing to embrace and hold on to negative experiences, perpetuating something that might not necessarily be His will for us any longer.
It is my belief that in most instances, God's will for us is to have good in our life. To have love, health, and prosperity. Many of the challenges that rock our world are there for no other reason than to move us more quickly into the good that He wants for us. At other times those challenges are there because we are sabotaging His will for us, and He allows us to do this. A third possibility is that we are to experience a challenge for most or all of our existence in order to progress in the way that is best suited to us.
It is imperative that we discover which of these scenarios is responsible for what is happening in our life. With this understanding, we can make better choices for moving through the challenge.
It takes honest and prayerful meditation to discover whether we are living God's will or sabotaging it. It is all too easy to look at our present results and assume that if God meant for them to be different, they would be. If God meant for me to have financial independence, I'd have been born with it. If He meant for me to have love, I'd have it. If He meant me to be well, I wouldn't be sick. Haven't I prayed for help? This must be His will for my life.
It is only through prayer, personal revelation and deeply honest introspection that we can come to the conclusion that we are meant to remain in a current challenge. Without that sacred witness, we must assume that what He wants is for us to learn from and move through the current lack in our life.
It takes courage to look deeply enough to discover the truth about sabotaging. Sabotaging is usually done out of fear-an attempt to protect ourselves. You may have to ponder what it is you are afraid of. Often when we use 'It's God's will' as an excuse, we are using it as a cop out from exercising faith.
If it isn't God's will that we remain in a current challenge, that of course means we will need to exercise faith for change. We may discover fears such as: What if I don't have enough faith? What if He won't help me? What if I fail? Once we honestly assess these fears and concerns we can begin, with God's help, to address and move through them.
Perhaps it feels presumptuous to you to assume that God might want more good for you in your life. As a parent, wouldn't you be pleased if your child fully engaged in a challenge with the purpose of learning what needed to be learned, mastered the skill, and moved on?
Also keep in mind that where much is given much is required. The reason He wants us to prosper is because there is so much work to do. God has work to do and wants us involved, laboring in His vineyard.
From this perspective, this good in our life is a means to an end, not the end itself. If we are stable financially, physically healthy, and existing in fulfilling relationships, how much better are we able to do His work than if we are not? Of course this is what He wants for us.
To Engage or To Release?
Once we have determined whether the challenge we are dealing with is evidence of our own sabotage or God's will for our growth, we will know how to proceed.
If we discover that this challenge is no longer what God wants for us, it's time to 'release that which we no longer need' (Louise Hay, You Can Heal Your Life) and start affirming truth in our lives. We may need to work on issues of deserving. We may need to overcome false beliefs such as 'there isn't enough' or 'it's too hard' or 'it's not safe'.
Realize that if we really believed that what we are striving for was in our best good, we would already have it. We must change those inner beliefs to be in accordance with God's will. We can use visualization techniques, we can work with a counselor. Keep a vision of where you feel God wants your life to be and solutions will open up to you. Be patient, with time you will see progress.
If, however, you feel that this trial is something God has helped place in your life, then it's time to engage. Ponder, pray, explore, examine, study. Think of it as a wave and you are the surfer who's trying to catch it. Ride it as far as it can take you.
Resist berating yourself for where you are at. Be grateful for the opportunity because this is evidence that God feels you are ready for growth and change. Accept the feelings and reactions you have with patience and love. They are coming to the surface because it's time to grow through them.
When you have times of doubt, think back on the time when you felt an understanding for His will in your life. He won't leave you alone through this period of growth. He knows and wants what is for your best good.
Reliv-my life saver!
My favorite supplement of ALL time! Starting reliv was seriously the beginning of getting my life back. I will never forget one spring day after having been on the product long enough to see serious results. I was dropping my daughter off at her dance class and it had been a busy day and I FELT GREAT! My mom had been the one who bugged me and bugged me until I finally started taking it. I remember that day calling my mom and crying and saying, "Thank you for giving me my life back." How sappy is that? But totally the truth. If you've lost your health, and then gotten it back, you know it's not sappy, it's just SO COOL!
I seriously doubt anyone reading this could be more skeptical than I was before I started taking reliv. I was convinced that anyone selling supplements was a crook and a scam artist, they only wanted my money, it was too expensive, it was too good to be true, etc. etc. etc. Fortunately, I have a very bossy mom. She pretty much wouldn't leave me alone, very effectively using the 'reliv system' to get me started. What is the reliv system? It is an amazing, catalogued network of people willing to talk to you on the phone who have dealt with the same health issues you have, thus establishing hope, and a personalized protocol for you. The thing I love about this system, is that most of these people aren't even in your upline, so they have no vested interest in you buying the product, it's just been established within the company that people help each other get well. This isn't that hard to believe because anyone who's been unhealthy and then gets healthy, is usually so excited about it, they want to help others. I learned later, as I studied mind, body, healing, that establishing hope was probably a big part of reliv's success. As the hope worked together with the amazing product, great results were achieved. Reliv has a high ethic of what a distributor/customer relationship should be. The distributor is expected to work closely with the customer, helping them through whatever bumps they may encounter on their road to healing. The goal is more about results for the customer, than high product movement for the distributor. For that reason, you can't just log onto Reliv.com and order product, nor will you ever find reliv in a store of any kind. It has only been recently that Reliv has started allowing their distributors to sell their product online, so concerned are they that a consistent, supportive relationship ensues between distributor and customer.
Detox
It is not unusual for a person starting Reliv to experience some detox. Mine was pretty intense. If I didn't have my mom (also my distributor) scouring the system through her upline for people to support me and answer my questions, I would definitely have quit the product. They told me I was going through a 'healing crisis'. Uh-huh. That's a convenient response for you to give me when I tell you that your product is making me FEEL LIKE CRAP! Well, that was about 6 years ago when nobody I knew had ever heard of a 'healing crisis', and detox was generally something you heard about people getting off of drugs. Nowadays everybody wants to detox and 'healing crisis' seems pretty logical. Luckily, I stuck through it and found that a 'healing crisis' is a legitimate step in the healing process. My body felt like crap because of all the crap I was dumping! I only felt really yucchy for 3-4 weeks, and from then on it was steady improvement. Within 3 months after starting the product I felt that I had a new lease on life. It was truly incredible. I had never in my adult life been in good health, so it was like getting glasses for the first time, stepping outside and seeing that the trees have individual leaves. It was so awesome. And yes, you cynics out there, I still take reliv and I still feel great!
The Cost
If you decide that you want to try reliv, definitely work with a distributor. Most people start with their main product, Classic. They usually combine that with Innergize. I also started with Fibrestore. Reliv products are soy based.
Because of the poor health I was in, it was recommended that I take 3-4 times the maintenance amount. At that time the maintenance amount cost about $70 a month retail. I didn't even feel justified spending that. But I did go ahead and start out with d double dose to accelerate my healing. I got into my 'healing crisis' and was strongly encouraged to increase. I think the most I ever took was 3 times the regular amount. Everybody kept promising me I wouldn't have to keep taking that much, which I was counting on because it was breaking the bank! They were right. Once I got feeling better I cut back to the double dose. I did the double dose for a couple of years. During that time I was aggressive with my mind/body healing and now I only require the maintenance dose.
So, yes, it is an investment. And you have to get to the point where your health is that important to you. What's more important, that new car with the hefty payment, or your health? We usually can find a way to improve our circumstances if we are truly committed.
Why does it work? (And is it too good to be true?)
One of my concerns before I started using Classic is that people were claiming it healed everything from diabetes to MS to bipolar. I thought to myself, nothing is that good! It's not even logical! Well, turns out, it is, and here's why. It isn't the reliv healing you, IT'S YOUR BODY! How cool is that? I had very suspiciously asked my dad, a pharmacist, "What's in this stuff? What's the magical ingredient that is so powerful it can heal all these diseases?" He explained it this way, "I don't know if it's necessarily that there's some unusual ingredient, I think it's more the delivery. Our bodies are undernourished, so they are manifesting all these diseases and are unable to do what they were programmed to do, heal. So, when we give them this nutrition in such an efficient way, our bodies suddenly start doing what they are supposed to be doing." So many of our vitamins are sitting in the sewers in their original form. Yes, you ate it, and it passed right through you! It didn't do you any good! But reliv is an awesome nutritional supplement that is absorbed into your cells within 15 minutes. Your body is doing a celebration dance inside and sending out the newly energized reinforcements to do what they do best.
Innergize (besides making Classic more palatable...I'll admit it, it's nasty!), is loaded with vitamin C and hydrates the cells. I love it, and often drink it plain or give it to my kids when they are sick and need a tasty nutritious liquid.
Fibrestore is an awesome fiber supplement that cleanses and detoxifies at the cellular level. It is my best friend. Seriously.
Reliv has many other products, especially some great ones for kids. But those are the main ones I have used and have experience with. You name it, Reliv can help you with it. I'm not seeking out new customers right now, but if you come to me, I'm happy to support you or refer you to someone who can. Call 801-451-9421 if you want to give it a try.
You Can Heal Your Life
by Louise Hay
This was the second book I read in my mind/body healing journey. I felt that everything I had been taught, all the cultural norms and mores I had never even been aware of let alone questioned, had to be re-examined as I read this book. It was like putting on an entirely new set of lenses with which to view myself and my life. When I came across a new idea, I would set the book aside for a while so I could process, ponder, evaluate, and assimilate the idea. There were a few ideas I disagreed with, but everything in here I at least considered and examined closely before discarding it as half-truth or false. I was surprised that the majority of the ideas in the book I agreed with, once I had given them sufficient thought. I believe we all have the ability to discern truth from error when we are living close to God through prayer and study.
There were many life-changing principles I learned from this book, but I will only mention one of them here. Louise Hay teaches that everything in our life is there because we want it there. This was highly offensive to me when I first read it. I had been un-well most of my adult life and when I read this book I had spent the previous 3 years deteriorating after having 2 babies close together. On a conscious level there was simply nothing I wanted more than to be healthy and well. To state that I was sick because I wanted it just plain made me mad. But there is something hardwired into my brain, call it OCD, or whatever you want, that doesn't allow me to move on from an idea until I have looked at it from every angle, prayed about it, pondered it, held it up to the light and looked deep into the dark places inside myself. To my great shock and disappointment, I discovered that yes, I had some payoffs for being sick. In other words, it was meeting some needs that I hadn't figured out yet how to meet in other ways.
The great news about this discovery was that maybe I had a little more control over my health than I had previously thought. Perhaps I could figure out how to meet those needs in healthy ways, thus eliminating the pattern in my life of 'dis-ease', as Louise calls it. I set my mind to it and I won't say it was easy. These were some pretty deeply rooted habits. But I was determined. I was done being sick. So I took the next step in my journey and starting 'releasing the need' to be sick by getting my payoffs in healthy ways. I'll get specific with one example. I used to have a really hard time asking for help. To admit that I needed help from someone was so horrible, I can't even describe it. One of the first payoffs that I recognized was that being sick gave me the 'right' to ask for help. If I was well, but a little tired, I would never ask my husband to hold down the fort while I had a power nap. But if I was suffering from one of my bouts of stomach pain, I knew I was justified to go lay down in the bedroom for a bit while he took care of things. The funny thing was that none of this was coming from him. He was fine to do his part either way, it was all in my head. I was only giving myself permission to receive help if I was sick. So, I got sick. It was working pretty effectively!
Well, I knew that I needed to start opening my mouth and asking for help. It was like my mouth was nailed shut. It was so hard at first! But little by little, I starting prying my mouth open and asking for help when I needed it. It is something that has changed drastically in my life and I would say now I'm pretty good at it. I had to tell myself that I didn't need to be sick anymore, I would take care of my needs in healthy ways.
One other great thing about this book is that at the end she has compiled a list of common physical ailments with their corresponding emotional imbalance. It is truly amazing how often this is right on. Our body's ailments are messages to us of things we need to heal in our lives. This resource at the back of her book takes a lot of the work out of figuring out what the message is for you. It is also insightful for understanding our childrens' needs when they are dealing with health issues.
I don't buy very many books, most I borrow from the library, but this is one that I recommend everyone have on their shelf. The resource at the back is so valuable. I use it on a weekly basis.
Friday, March 19, 2010
Probiotics?
I have introduced a new product on my website (iwellnesslearning.com) called Floraderm. It is a specially formulated probiotic for optimal digestion and healthy skin. I have personally used this product for about 12 years and have found it essential for maintaining a clear complexion as well as healthy digestion.
What are Probiotics?
We all have beneficial bacteria normally found in our bodies, especially in our digestive tracts. These 'friendly' bacteria assist with digestion and help protect against harmful bacteria. "An estimated 100 trillion microorganisms representing more than 500 different species inhabit every normal, healthy bowel." (Harvard Medical School Family Health Guide: http://www.health.harvard.edu/fhg/updates/update0905c.shtml)
Unfortunately, the diet and lifestyle of Americans has made most of us deficient in these helpful bacteria. One of the negative side effects of antibiotics is to kill off the good bacteria along with the bad. Birth control pills, white flour, processed foods and sugar all contribute to a gut environment hostile to these beneficial bacteria. This is a major contributing factor to the common problem of digestive complaints in the U.S. today. Taking probiotic supplements helps to build up a healthy supply of these 'friendly' bacteria in your intestines.
A growing body of scientific evidence suggests that you can treat and even prevent some illnesses with certain kinds of live bacteria. Researchers are finding encouraging evidence that probiotics may help:
- Treat diarhhea
- Treat IBS
- Shorten the duration of intestinal infections
- Prevent eczema in children
- Contribute to immune function
It is important to not just take any probiotic. many probiotic supplements have been shown not to actually retain the number of live bacteria claimed on their label. Dr. Shahani's probiotics are manufactured and packaged under rigorously strict conditions, guaranteeing the highest level of quality and delivery of healthy bacteria. Because of his pioneering research in the field of friendly bacteria or probiotics, Dr. Shahani is now respected as one of the most important figures in probiotic research.
How I Use Probiotics in My Family
I take several of these capsules a day. When I first started taking them, I had serious acne problems and regular stomach complaints. Because I was focusing on 'recolonizing' my intestinal tract, I started by taking more, and tapered down. Of all the methods I used to restore my health, this supplement was an essential ingredient that I still use today to maintain.
Whenever anyone in my family gets stomach complaints, I give them 1-2 capsules. Consider this as an alternative to Tums, PeptoBismal, antacids or any other over the counter stomach medicines. The great thing about probiotics however is there are no negative side effects, no rebound effects, no calcium leaching from the bones, etc. You are simply replacing an element in the body that you are deficient in, giving your body the chance to heal the problem from the inside out.
For my young children, I break the capsule apart and put it in applesauce or yogurt. When anyone is coming down with a cold I also give them a capsule a day for a few days as healthy bacteria have been shown to help keep harmful bacteria in check.
Sources; Helpful Links for Further Research:
The Harvard Medical School Family Health Guide:
http://www.health.harvard.edu/fhg/updates/update0905c.shtml
Mayo Clinic
http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/probiotics/AN00389
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